[love is more thicker than forget]

BY E. E. CUMMINGS

love is more thicker than forget
more thinner than recall
more seldom than a wave is wet
more frequent than to fail

it is most mad and moonly
and less it shall unbe
than all the sea which only
is deeper than the sea

love is less always than to win
less never than alive
less bigger than the least begin
less littler than forgive

it is most sane and sunly
and more it cannot die
than all the sky which only
is higher than the sky

Cameron and Lonnie

Cameron Varnell

Cameron was born August 19, 2000 and he left this world on April 16, 2013, after a five-year battle with leukemia. Known for his bright smile and sparkling blue eyes, Cameron was brave, kind, mischievous, and full of an infectious energy. He loved playing video games, collecting precious stones, taking pictures, and playing with his little sister. He beat cancer five times! He stayed ahead in school, even when all odds were against him. He never lost his loving spirit, his curiosity about the world, and his joy in each day of living. He loved baseball and swimming, music and movies, and his friends and family. In his last battle with the disease, although he was in pain, Cameron made a brave choice not to be medicated but to be fully aware and present in his final days at home. He departed this earth free of fear and unafraid of his next journey. He willingly said goodbye to his earthly body, and to the fear and sadness that cancer had brought with it. Cameron is survived by his parents, Allison & George Tannehill and Lonnie Varnell & Bambi Nola, and a little sister, Cayenne, all formerly of Shreveport and now in Redway, CA. He also leaves behind a large and loving family, and many friends in both the Shreveport and Redway communities, as well as at St. Jude’s, where he spent much of the last several years. In addition, Cameron was an inspiration to the countless people who were touched by his story and the courage and strength with which he faced cancer over and over again. A celebration of Cameron’s life will be held from 12-3pm on June 8,2013 at All Souls Unitarian Church in Shreveport. Guests are encouraged to wear his favorite color, green, in tribute to the amazing, sweet spirit of this boy who was so loving to all and so very loved by many. ♥

A Drop of Love ♥

I would like to honor Cameron and remember him as a soldier who battled cancer bravely, with a strength of spirit that inspired many. May his memory live on and continue to inspire others to have HOPE, LOVE and FAITH. Many blessings to the family and friends of this epic young man.

~ Drea Jensen

To create one’s own world, in any of the arts, takes courage.
Making your unknown known is the important thing.

I don’t see why we ever think of what others think of what we do — no matter who they are. Isn’t it enough just to express yourself?

I’ve been absolutely terrified every moment of my life — and I’ve never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do.

The days you work are the best days.

Quotations from Georgia O’Keeffe (1887-1986)

Allison and Cameron

By Allison Giles Tannehill

May 11, 2013

As I sit and stare!
Stare into the darkness.
So many thoughts but really none at all.
You will never be back in this physical world.
NEVER!
The truth fucking sucks.
To understand that my heart can not.
It does not understand this truth, this pain,
this misfortune.
Why?
Why you?
I want to know why?
Why you were chosen?
Why did you have to leave me?
My truth knows why but
my heart will never understand.
I LOVE YOU.
I MISS YOU.
I want you here with me.
Our bond was like no other.
Our love complete.
Two hearts beating together.
Loving one another
forever.
Your heart failed you
but your love out grew you.
Time was cut short
and your flight was taken.
I want this empty space to leave and fly with you.
To the beyond. To freedom.
To a world past any comprehension of my worldly mind.
I want to soar in the afterlife with you.
I want our love to ride through eternity.
Connected.
FOREVER.
You are light, peace, and healed.
I am done, broken, and empty.
Wrap your loving lightness around my darkness.
And fill me back up.
Only you can help me find my way home.
Thank you
for our love,
our perfect oneness.
Thank you for allowing me to feel.
Thank you for your heart, smile, and love that only you could share.
You are my shining star.
My full moon,
my perfect wave.
With that perfection I can conquer all.

Four candles for Cameron and Allison ♥

Cameron Varnell ♥

Grief for Cameron’s passing comes in waves and I am struggling. Deep sadness for Allison and his dad Lonnie. Empathy for Orion for losing a friend at such a young age. So many emotions around death and questions about rebirth. How can we live with so many conflicting feelings?
Allison sent a package with some of Cameron’s belongings for Orion. Fresh tears and sadness over the reality that Cameron is really gone, he has left the planet, his spirit is free. We miss him daily and mourn that we will not hear his voice again telling us he loves us.

~ Drea Jensen

Prayer for Cameron

“Yet still, at the center of a grief-stricken heart, there is ever a golden field – alive, flourishing with enough soul to feed all who come there. This inextinguishable heart of Love protects life-force essence there, even while all else stands in ruins.”
~ Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes

ART ♥

We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.

T.S. Elliot ♥